{Five Minute Friday | Miss}

It's Five Minute Friday. That means unplanned, unedited, straight-from-the-heart-to-the-paper writing. Yep, you just write whatever comes out based on a word you're given. If you have five minutes, you should give it a try!  Find out how here.

This week the prompt is {MISS}. I am a day late to the party, but I made it. Woo!

Ready? GO.

Is there anyone else out there who loves a good plan? Yeah, me too. Sometimes, though, things happen that I couldn't have planned. Hiccups. Bumps in the road. Difficult seasons. Transitions. In those times, I find myself often looking up asking, "Is this part of the plan?" or "Lord, can we get past this point as quickly as possible?" There's something about the hard spots that make me want to rush through. It's like a head-down-running-as-fast-as-you-can kind of feeling.

Thankfully, the Lord is patient, and He taught me that I was asking the wrong questions in those moments. I learned that a better question was "Lord, What do you want me to see that I'm not seeing? What am I missing?" Yeah, that's the better question.

It's not that I stop praying for a change of scene or a swift resolution to the challenge at hand. I believe our conversations with God should be honest. But, Here's the thing: if we trust He's always working on our behalf, then we have to believe there's always something in every season that will be for our benefit. And because I know that He is good, and He's trustworthy, I don't want to miss the thing He has for me. I don't want to miss what He's doing or saying because I have my head down running toward the next thing as fast as I can. Besides, He always delivers on His promise to use everything for my good and His glory. You know what the best piece is? Lean in a bit so you don't miss this. You can always count on Him to reveal more of Himself, something more about His character, or about His love. And isn't knowing Him worth any momentary, light affliction? Yes, I'd say that it is. That's certainly not something I'm willing to miss. I don't ever want to miss Him.

Stop.

{Worship | Three Things}

The Why.  It's the thing that motivates and moves you. It informs your behavior and shapes your attitudes. It's a BIG deal. Huge.

Why do we do what we do? Why do we say what we say? Why do we sing? Why do we play our instruments? When we define our "why" properly, we can feel confident that we are at least headed in the right direction. Here are three things to consider when defining the WHY behind worship.

1. Worship is a matter of the heart; it's about what we love. John Piper, one of the wisest theologians of this age wrote, "Worship is all about consciously reflecting the worth or value of God. The inner essence of worship is prizing Christ. Cherishing Him, treasuring Him, being satisfied with Him." And isn't it true? Worship from a divided heart does not properly reflect the worth or value of God. It just can't. He gives everything and deserves everything in return.  May we continuously, deliberately pursue Him so that we can know Him and love Him most of all. Then, let our love for Him be the primary reason we worship.

2. Worship is a function of the mind; it's about what you believe. We cannot overlook the importance of developing right knowledge of God.  Our theology (what we believe about God) is important because authentic worship cannot happen apart from right knowledge of God. In worship, our theology shapes our philosophy (what one believes about worship). In turn, our philosophy of worship determines our methodology (how one does worship). Knowing God more fully enables us to worship Him more fully. Theology, rightly applied, will inform our minds and captivate our hearts so that we love God passionately.  You cannot encounter the truth of who God is and be left unchanged. So then, let the truth of who He is define our worship.

3. Worship is lived out in the moments of everyday life. I love corporate worship. There is something especially beautiful when God's people gather and worship. But, corporate worship is meant to be a natural overflow of personal, private devotion. Day after day, in every moment, there is a battle being waged for our attention and our affection. The enemy of our soul would like nothing more than to see our worship misguided and misdirected. He laughs, pleased with himself,  when Christians become comfortable with the monotony of our religious activities, the going-through-the-motions because our hearts and minds aren't engaged. He celebrates a tiny victory when we live so distracted through the week that we neglect turning our attention toward Our Father. What if we allow our love for Him and our relationship with Him to seep into our everyday moments? See,  if we love Him passionately and know Him intimately, then pausing to make space for Him in the tiniest details of our life is just what we do. He is concerned with the details, after all. He's there, waiting to be invited into the everyday moments. Can we learn to recognize Him in those everyday moments, and allow our lives to be consumed by Him and surrendered to the Holy Spirit? And then, worship becomes the natural response because we are mindful of Him.

Here's the thing: Worship is about our posture and position. It's the posture of our hearts and minds and our position in Christ. Our entire lives positioned firmly in Him.  It's about seeing ourselves in light of who He is and what He's done for us. See, for me, when I have a true picture of His holiness, goodness, faithfulness, and unfailing love, I immediately recognize my utter need for Him.  That's when our worship becomes real. That's when we stand up to sing songs about Him and we mean it. We believe it. We live it. HE becomes our why.  And, then, our why is bigger than life! And worship from that posture becomes less about our preferences and more about His presence. We can't encounter His presence and be left unaffected. 

May I encourage you today, sweet friends? Look up. Fix your eyes on Him. What you'll find is that He's already gazing back at you. You've captured His heart and He longs to capture yours.

{Remember His Faithfulness}

Finally, early spring was peeking through the dreary gray of a long, long winter. B. and I piled into the car and headed in a direction that I hadn't been in a long while. This place. It represented some of the most difficult moments of my life. You know, all of the moments I didn't care to relive. I didn't go often.

Each time I visited this place in the past, the pain and anxiety crept in and gripped my heart and mind the second my car approached the driveway. Images raced through my mind in rapid fire and the deep ache that had become so familiar pressed hard on me. Sometimes, I felt better after a visit because that's what happens after a good, ugly cry. Other times, though, bitterness tightened its fierce grip on my heart, and I would leave feeling more hopeless and helpless. But this time it would be different. I was different.

The car turned into the gravel drive and evidence of time passed was striking. Trees were much larger; and, the sprawling, empty field of grass that I remembered wasn't sprawling and empty. There were rows and rows of gravesites, almost as far as my eye could see. My eyes searched for the beautiful tree that grew just behind the plot chosen for my sweet babies, Tyler and Hailey. It took me a few minutes to get out. But, I did.

It's hard to put into words exactly what happened during that graveside visit. B. stayed in the car because he knew this moment was between a girl and God. See, in the weeks and months prior, the Lord had been healing my heart and my perspective. I had finally released the right to be angry and bitter and allowed Him to work a miracle in me. And, He did just that. So, there I was. My being there was a matter of obedience. The Lord was taking me back to this spot so I could see it with fresh eyes through the lens of a healed heart and mind. We had a sweet moment, the Lord and I. I knelt graveside and prayed, weeping. But these tears were different. I was grateful and in awe of God and His unfailing love and faithfulness. Before I knew what happened, my arms were stretched to the sky and I was singing.

For thou O, Lord are high above all the earth. Thou art exalted far above all Gods. I exalt Thee. I exalt Thee. I exalt Thee, O Lord.

In that moment of worship, there was a beautiful exchange: beauty for ashes, joy for mourning. In that moment, He reignited a passion and a calling for worship leading. In that moment, He reminded me of His lavish, unfailing love.

Fast-forward to January 2016. It's a season of many challenges. I'm talking about the kind of challenges that, in the moment, make you want to run and hide. Quit. Give-up. These are the kinds of challenges that sweep through every inch of your world like a tidal wave and knock you off your feet. It's all I could do to keep my head above water. But God has a beautiful way of reminding us that He's with us.

There I was standing in a room during a night of worship. The evening had already been like a breath of fresh air. Just as I was asking the Lord what He wanted me to do, a new song rang out in the room.

I exalt Thee. I exalt Thee. I exalt Thee, O Lord.

I hit my knees. Once again in awe of God's faithfulness. He was reminding me of where He brought me from. He was reminding me that He lifted me out of a deep pit, healed me and restored me. He was reminding me that He was the same God that held me in His hands when I knelt graveside all those years ago. He told me to get up and do the thing He's called me to do with bold faith. Why? Because He's proven Himself faithful over and over again. He is God. He is always God.

May I encourage you today? On those days that God seems far off, remember WHO He is. On those days that God seems quiet, remember how He's been faithful. I promise you this: God is always there and He's always faithful. Do the next thing simply because God is who He says He is. Then watch Him do what only He can do, proving again that He is faithful beyond measure.

He. Never. Leaves. You. He loves you so.

{Proof Prayer is Working}

Prayer is a privilege. A gift. Sometimes, though,  it seems like prayer is one-sided conversation with an imaginary friend. Or even worse, it seems like you're talking to yourself. We know better - we've been taught otherwise. But, do you ever wish there was one tiny indication that your prayers are working? You know, something that would bolster your faith and confidence. Yeah, me too. We know what Scripture says about prayer. But, there are times when it seems like you pray and nothing happens. Nothing. Crickets.  Might I suggest, though, that one of the functions of prayer is to remind us that He is God and we are not. And perhaps, one of the functions of prayer is to change us even before changing our circumstances or without changing our circumstances at all. Maybe that's our proof, our sign, that it's working. Yeah, what if it's that? 

Meet Hannah. Hannah was wife to Elkanah. (Let's call him E. from now on.) But, Hannah wasn't the only wife in E.'s house. Meet Peninnah, the other woman. (Let's call her P. from now on.)  There were two important distinctions made between these women. First, P. had children and Hannah did not. Hannah was barren. Second, E. loved Hannah; she was his favorite. Maybe the complexity of the situation isn't obvious. First, having children back in the day was a big deal. It was such a big deal that women who were unable to have children were considered failures. So, there's that. Then, add to the mix that the other woman in the house made it her business to provoke and irritate Hannah and the situation seems unbearable.  See, P. treated Hannah as a rival. And poor E., he didn't get it. He didn't understand Hannah's plight and was convinced that his love for her should be enough to soothe Hannah's sad heart.

So, here's what we know about Hannah so far. Hannah was barren, misunderstood, provoked, ridiculed, bitterly angry, wept openly, and wouldn't eat or sleep. Her heart was grieved and her soul was in deep anguish. She was physically ill. Have you ever been in such anguish that it physically hurt? This is the Hannah we find in verse nine. Scripture says she was at the temple of the Lord and guess what she does? She prayed. No, wait. Hannah poured out her soul to the Lord. Poured out her soul. Then, she went on her way and ate and her face was no longer downcast. And, there it is. She poured her heart out honestly to the Lord and was changed. Her circumstance didn't change immediately, but she did. That's what it looks like when we leave our stuff at the feet of Jesus. When Hannah got up, she wasn't carrying the weight of her anguish and grief, and you can see the difference on her face and in her behavior. She wasn't carrying it, because the Lord carried it for her. Early the next morning, Scripture says the family worshiped. Hannah worshiped though everything around her remained unchanged.

The Lord did give Hannah a son, the one she asked for when she poured out her soul. She named him Samuel. What's more remarkable than that is that when Samuel was still young, she took him back to the temple at Shiloh (the same temple where she poured her soul out) to live and serve. Samuel was Israel's greatest judge.

Here's what Hannah teaches us:

1. Prayer and intimacy with God will change you. Pray honestly and specifically. The Lord can handle our deep anguish and grieved hearts. He expects us to be honest with Him. In my life, the most healing comes only when I'm willing to be honest with Him. When we refuse to see our real selves and cooperate with His process, when we refuse to be honest with Him, we are rejecting the work He wants to do to change us. 

2. Even in the midst of difficult circumstances, choose to worship. When presented with the choice, don't choose to wallow in your anguish and trouble. There's a difference between going-through-the-motions worship and honest-straight-from-the-heart worship. Perfunctory prayer often cultivates going-through-the-motions worship. Hannah could worship honestly before the Lord because she prayed honestly to the Lord. And, she chose to worship though her circumstances remained unchanged.

3. Open-handed living is the best way. Hannah recognized the child she was given was given to her by God. Samuel was His before he was her's. Just like everything we've been given. Hannah gives us a beautiful example of open-handed living. What's mine is not mine. What's mine is His. That's why she took him to the temple. God did great things through the life of Samuel.

4. God's timing is impeccable and there is a bigger picture that reaches beyond what you want. Scripture says the Lord closed Hannah's womb. Until just the right time. God had very specific purposes for Samuel, just like with all of us. He places us in a specific space in time -- no sooner, no later -- than exactly when He wants us. There was something bigger going on here, something that would impact an entire nation.  Maybe if God had answered Hannah's prayer a few years earlier, she would have been less likely to bring the child back to the temple. You never know. But, you can be sure God knew. The same holds true for us.

May I encourage you and challenge you today? Are you're sitting in an impossible situation waiting for God to "birth" something of substance? Pray. Pray about it more than you talk about it. And, don't wallow. Let your prayers be honest and let them do the work of changing you while God does the work of changing the circumstances. God will equip you to sit in the same impossible situation and be filled with joy. He will, if you let Him. Be like Hannah. Be brave. Be honest. Be steadfast.

After Hannah left her son Samuel, she prayed again. "My heart rejoices in the Lord. . ." When we land there, we can be sure our prayers are doing exactly what they are designed to do.

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