{Dear Momma, It's Almost Your Birthday!}

Tomorrow is your birthday! I'm sure you have plans to celebrate -- at least, I hope you do. You deserve to celebrate. I'm looking forward to celebrating with you in a few weeks! That will be big fun! But, in the meantime, I thought it'd be a good day to remind you of a couple of things. You spent years pouring into me, and I wanted to pour something into you. So, here's what I want you to know.

1. I am grateful for you. Yeah, for sure. A funny thing happens once you're a momma. You quickly realize that being a mom is hard. Even on my best day, those pesky doubts creep in and leave me feeling like I came up short. And on my worst day - well, let's just say I'm left looking for a place to hide to avoid scarring my children for life. So not only do I want to say thank you, I want you to know that you did a good job. Whatever you did or didn't do, it worked out just fine. What I didn't quite understand back then was that being a mom was not your only gig. You were doing and being a lot of other things, too. So, thanks mom for sticking with it when you were exhausted and overwhelmed, on good days and bad, and on days when being a mom was the hardest hat you had to wear. Yeah, thank you.

2. I love you. But even more than that, God loves you. Maybe that feels a little cliche, but it's true. I am constantly reminding the kids of this truth, but sometimes, I need the reminder, too. I don't know the last time someone took the time to tell you: He loves you and you're pretty special, His masterpiece, in fact, created with intention and for purpose.

3. I pray for you. Being a momma is hard for sure, and so is being a woman. We push and strive trying to live up to unrealistic expectations and hard-to-keep-up-with standards. And we don't have to. We just don't. The mark of a great woman, I think, has nothing to do with all that and everything to do with how well we love the people God puts in front of us. And we can only do that well when we we fully realize how deeply loved we are. So, that's my prayer - that you know that you are deeply loved and can rest in that when rest is what you need. Nothing is wasted you know, even those seasons of difficulty; and, it is never to late to dream a new God-sized dream. This year, I'm praying that for you, too. 

You are lovely. I'm glad you're my mom. I am who I am because God wanted you to be my mom. I love that. I love you! Happy birthday, mom! Oh, and eat cake.

{Proof Prayer is Working}

Prayer is a privilege. A gift. Sometimes, though,  it seems like prayer is one-sided conversation with an imaginary friend. Or even worse, it seems like you're talking to yourself. We know better - we've been taught otherwise. But, do you ever wish there was one tiny indication that your prayers are working? You know, something that would bolster your faith and confidence. Yeah, me too. We know what Scripture says about prayer. But, there are times when it seems like you pray and nothing happens. Nothing. Crickets.  Might I suggest, though, that one of the functions of prayer is to remind us that He is God and we are not. And perhaps, one of the functions of prayer is to change us even before changing our circumstances or without changing our circumstances at all. Maybe that's our proof, our sign, that it's working. Yeah, what if it's that? 

Meet Hannah. Hannah was wife to Elkanah. (Let's call him E. from now on.) But, Hannah wasn't the only wife in E.'s house. Meet Peninnah, the other woman. (Let's call her P. from now on.)  There were two important distinctions made between these women. First, P. had children and Hannah did not. Hannah was barren. Second, E. loved Hannah; she was his favorite. Maybe the complexity of the situation isn't obvious. First, having children back in the day was a big deal. It was such a big deal that women who were unable to have children were considered failures. So, there's that. Then, add to the mix that the other woman in the house made it her business to provoke and irritate Hannah and the situation seems unbearable.  See, P. treated Hannah as a rival. And poor E., he didn't get it. He didn't understand Hannah's plight and was convinced that his love for her should be enough to soothe Hannah's sad heart.

So, here's what we know about Hannah so far. Hannah was barren, misunderstood, provoked, ridiculed, bitterly angry, wept openly, and wouldn't eat or sleep. Her heart was grieved and her soul was in deep anguish. She was physically ill. Have you ever been in such anguish that it physically hurt? This is the Hannah we find in verse nine. Scripture says she was at the temple of the Lord and guess what she does? She prayed. No, wait. Hannah poured out her soul to the Lord. Poured out her soul. Then, she went on her way and ate and her face was no longer downcast. And, there it is. She poured her heart out honestly to the Lord and was changed. Her circumstance didn't change immediately, but she did. That's what it looks like when we leave our stuff at the feet of Jesus. When Hannah got up, she wasn't carrying the weight of her anguish and grief, and you can see the difference on her face and in her behavior. She wasn't carrying it, because the Lord carried it for her. Early the next morning, Scripture says the family worshiped. Hannah worshiped though everything around her remained unchanged.

The Lord did give Hannah a son, the one she asked for when she poured out her soul. She named him Samuel. What's more remarkable than that is that when Samuel was still young, she took him back to the temple at Shiloh (the same temple where she poured her soul out) to live and serve. Samuel was Israel's greatest judge.

Here's what Hannah teaches us:

1. Prayer and intimacy with God will change you. Pray honestly and specifically. The Lord can handle our deep anguish and grieved hearts. He expects us to be honest with Him. In my life, the most healing comes only when I'm willing to be honest with Him. When we refuse to see our real selves and cooperate with His process, when we refuse to be honest with Him, we are rejecting the work He wants to do to change us. 

2. Even in the midst of difficult circumstances, choose to worship. When presented with the choice, don't choose to wallow in your anguish and trouble. There's a difference between going-through-the-motions worship and honest-straight-from-the-heart worship. Perfunctory prayer often cultivates going-through-the-motions worship. Hannah could worship honestly before the Lord because she prayed honestly to the Lord. And, she chose to worship though her circumstances remained unchanged.

3. Open-handed living is the best way. Hannah recognized the child she was given was given to her by God. Samuel was His before he was her's. Just like everything we've been given. Hannah gives us a beautiful example of open-handed living. What's mine is not mine. What's mine is His. That's why she took him to the temple. God did great things through the life of Samuel.

4. God's timing is impeccable and there is a bigger picture that reaches beyond what you want. Scripture says the Lord closed Hannah's womb. Until just the right time. God had very specific purposes for Samuel, just like with all of us. He places us in a specific space in time -- no sooner, no later -- than exactly when He wants us. There was something bigger going on here, something that would impact an entire nation.  Maybe if God had answered Hannah's prayer a few years earlier, she would have been less likely to bring the child back to the temple. You never know. But, you can be sure God knew. The same holds true for us.

May I encourage you and challenge you today? Are you're sitting in an impossible situation waiting for God to "birth" something of substance? Pray. Pray about it more than you talk about it. And, don't wallow. Let your prayers be honest and let them do the work of changing you while God does the work of changing the circumstances. God will equip you to sit in the same impossible situation and be filled with joy. He will, if you let Him. Be like Hannah. Be brave. Be honest. Be steadfast.

After Hannah left her son Samuel, she prayed again. "My heart rejoices in the Lord. . ." When we land there, we can be sure our prayers are doing exactly what they are designed to do.

---

{Don't Hide. Obey.}

With every step toward the door of the restaurant, my heart pounded and the sick feeling in the pit of my stomach nearly overcame me. Just keep walking. And smile. They are watching you, after all. I wish they weren’t watching me! Just. Keep. Walking. If I hesitate, they will bail. Who am I kidding? Let's bail! That's a great idea!

Our family was there for a dinner meeting with my recently-divorced-a-second-time ex-husband and his new girlfriend. Did I mention that she had been my best friend? That’s right. My recently-divorced-a-second-time ex-husband was dating my used-to-be-best friend. The two of them had just welcomed a new baby, which, by the way, we only heard news of about a month before the arrival. We put the meeting off as long as we could. But now, we had to make introductions.

When I say that the kids were stressed and opposed to the introduction, I’m putting it mildly. The last time their Dad introduced a woman into their lives it ended badly. His last wife was, well, I can’t quite find a word that fits. She didn’t care for the kids, and they suffered emotionally at her hand. Even worse, the relationship between the kids and their dad was strained and damaged. He had barely started making an effort to reach out to them, and then, this. They just were not ready. What I really wanted to do was pitch a fit and tell him that I was disappointed and that he was on his own. There was no way I was going to help him out with this one! No way. Nope. Forget it.

But there was a not-so-gentle nudge to invite them for dinner. You know what that means, right? Now, because of that not-so-gentle nudge, inviting them to dinner was a matter of obedience. And that’s how we ended up in this mess! 

Am I alone here?  Have you ever felt like the right thing to do seemed the most unfair, impossible thing to do? Have you ever been standing in a moment with a decision to make and thought “There is absolutely no way I can do this!"? Yeah, that was me. Exactly. But, here's the thing: when you know the right thing to do and don't do it - it's sin.

Still, this was not exactly something I was looking forward to. But, wait.

God sent Jesus. And the last words that rolled off the tongue of the Savior as He died on the cross were “It is finished.” His work on the cross was done. He won. And so did we. It was the most lavish display of love the world has ever seen. In that moment, we were granted access to everything we would ever need to do those impossible, unfair, and uncomfortable things. Sometimes it seems the implication of that truth is lost on us. Do we really know what it means to have access to the same power that raised Jesus from the dead every moment, every day. Death-to-life power. In us. I mean, come on now. That's huge!  You know, He is constantly working in us to make us more like Himself. That means He doesn't leave us hanging on the edge of any situation left to figure it out on our own. Even the most impossible, unfair, and most uncomfortable situation.

We finally made it into the restaurant. We stood in the corner - still trying to decide if this impossible thing was possible. What seemed like an eternity passed before we walked toward the table. Both my daughter and son were trying to make themselves invisible behind me. But, we walked on, stumbling over each other. 

And there they were. My ex-husband. My used-to-be best friend. The new baby. And, three other children from his second marriage. Lord, help me do this. This is beyond the worse case scenario. She was my best friend. She was my best friend, and it didn't end well! I can’t do this! Do you think they noticed us? Maybe there’s still time to duck behind a table! Yeah, in that moment I'm sure we were all thinking the same thing. If only we could make ourselves invisible!

But, no. They saw us. There may have been a faint whisper of a cuss word in my mind before I managed to pull myself together.  Lord, please. Help. Me.  Before I knew what happened she had both her arms wrapped around me and tears forming in her eyes. And I was hugging her back! It was a real hug, too. It wasn't me trying to squeeze the life out of her. Dinner was as good as it could have been given the circumstance. Conversation was easy-ish. And, the kids were ok-ish. We didn't knock it out of the park, but we did the right thing. This time it just so happened that the right thing was really hard. It would have been so much easier to hide. But, I'm glad we didn't because God reminded me of something through the process.

See, God had already been in that moment. Long before I dragged my kids into the Chick-fil-a, He was there. I only had to choose to see Him. I only had to choose to access the power of the Holy Spirit that was available to me by saying yes to Him.  When you push through the fear and anxiety and obey anyway, God will enable you to do what He's asking. God reminded me that when we are standing on the edge of something impossibly difficult searching, doubting, trying to find a way to run, that not only is He with us, but  He’s  already been there ahead of us, fighting for us. And He won. It. Is. Finished. Our job is to fix our eyes on Him and to do the thing He’s asked us to do, even if it means doing it with teary eyes and trembling hands. Just obey. And, when you do the thing He's asking,  do it trusting that He's got it all under control. Of course He does.  See, God loves us so fervently that He sent Jesus to die for us so that we would never have to do these hard things alone. Be brave. He knows exactly where you are every moment. And, He’s there too. 

And, in case you're wondering, things still aren't perfect or easy in this particular situation in our lives. But, there is a peace that is beyond comprehension. For that, I am thankful. 

{Dear Christian, Are You All In?}

She looked so small standing in the kitchen with her backpack hanging off her shoulders. She had on a little plaid skirt and a navy blue polo and looked darling. I couldn't believe she was off to Kindergarten. I cried that day, I'm sure. But, I also felt extremely fortunate that she would be heading off to a private, Christian school. Six years later, she was much bigger and was heading out the door to the same campus for her first day of sixth grade. This was the year she learned a hard but important truth. Just because you label something Christian doesn't mean it's a fair, true representation of the label. The sad truth my young daughter was learning is that many people identify themselves as Christian and behave much differently than one might expect Christians to behave. The sad truth is that there are loads of people who are nominal Christians - ones who wear the label but look no different than the ones who don't. She was so confused. We parented her through it and now she gets it, but in the moment it was a big deal. What we figured out is this: there are non-Christians even in places that you might expect to be full of Christians (like a Christian school), and you cannot expect non-Christians to behave like Christians. 

But what about those of us who call ourselves believers? What about those of us who say we've chosen to worship God? What does that look like? Here's what I know: worship is about who we are and what we do. It's about our attitudes and actions. It's about recognizing who God is and responding accordingly. When we consider all of these, we gain a more complete perspective of worship and what it means in the life of a believer. Wandering aimlessly through our daily routines without consideration of what it means to belong to Christ doesn't work. Our lives must be lived with intention and purpose. People are watching. People are forming opinions about God and about His Church based on your behavior -- whether you like it or not. Here are three things we need to remember.

1. Worship is about what you love. It's a matter of heart. There is a battle constantly raging for our affection and devotion. We get into trouble when we try to live life from a divided heart. Scripture commands us to love the Lord with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. That's it!  We have to love God wholeheartedly, and live our lives motivated by that love. Paul wrote that everything else was worthless - like garbage! - compared to the value of knowing Christ. When we learn to prize Christ - to value, cherish, and treasure Him above all else, our lives will reflect that.  One thing is for sure, though. You cannot worship Him in truth if You do not know Him.

2. Worship is about what you believe. It's a function of the mind. Authentic worship cannot happen apart from right knowledge of God. Can you imagine staring into the face of Jesus and being asked, "Who do you say that I am"?  So, go on. How would you answer that question? You know, the way we answer that question informs what we believe about everything else. It shapes the way we think about life.  And, the things we believe about life and about God, will determine how we live it. Can you see why it's so important that we be able to answer the question of who God is accurately? As we come to know Him we can love Him more deeply. When our knowledge of God is accurate and our love of God is deep, then our worship is accurate (true) and passionate.

3. Worship is about how you live. It's about what you do. And, I'm not talking about just what you do on Sunday mornings! What we do on Sunday mornings in our corporate gatherings should be an extension and overflow of personal, private worship. If Sunday morning is the only time you turn your attention and affection toward the Lord, then you're doing it wrong. What we do, what we say, and how we live must be in alignment with the standard set forth in Scripture. Our actions and our attitudes in our Monday through Saturday lives have to reflect the truth we declare in our gatherings on Sunday mornings. We exist to honor, glorify, and obey Christ. We are instructed in Scripture to be godly examples in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity, to strive for personal holiness. It matters what you do. It matters how you handle yourself in every situation. That's what living worship is about. His name and His fame are on the line when you wear the label Christian. It's a big deal.

May I challenge you today? Take a few minutes, in a quiet space and imagine that you're staring in the face of Jesus who's asking you, "Who do you say I am?" Answer Him as honestly as you can.  And then, prayerfully identify things in your life that contradict what you believe about Him, and ask Him to help you change them. Be encouraged sweet friends. The Holy Spirit will do the work for you, if you invite Him.

Let this be your prayer: Teach me your ways, oh Lord, so I can live according to your truth. Grant me an undivided heart so that I can honor You, and let everything I do and everything I say be a true representation of who You are. (Ps. 86:11, Col. 3:17)

He loves you so. Don't settle for nominal Christianity. Just don't. The truth of who God is changes everything. Go all in.

{Improve Your Blog in One Simple Step}

Y'all might not know it, but blogging is one of my favorite things to do! My first post, nearly five years ago, was probably pretty lame. I know my blog design was pretty lame although it served its purpose well. But over time, the purpose evolved. Hopefully, it's all gotten a bit better. Even still, I had a hard time finding my groove - if you know what I mean. What I'm learning is that consistency is key, and you have to work at being consistent. How do you do that? I'm so glad you asked! Here's what has been working for me:

First things first! Get organized. Pick out a notebook or an app and start using it! Evernote is a great app for organizing your ideas, and any kind of notebook will do - as long as it has a sturdy cover and plenty of blank pages. Keeping all your ideas and inspiration in one place makes it much easier when you're wondering what in the world to write about next.

Once you have all your stuff in one place, you're one step away to a better blog! Exciting, isn't it!? So, what's one easy way to improve your blog?

Get a schedule. Yes, make a plan and work the plan. Now, before you throw up a red flag and claim that working from a writing schedule squelches creativity, hear me out. Having a writing schedule brings a sense of accountability to the table. Creating space to write will foster creativity and hone writing skills. I use a simple monthly calendar and schedule blog posts one month in advance. You can be as detailed as you would like. I make note of the category and/or title on the date the post will go live. I schedule writing time accordingly. Just get something on paper!

January was the first month I consistently put these things in practice. I set a goal for my blog and was able to hold myself accountable because I was organized and worked from a schedule. And, I did it!! Woo-hoo! If I can do it, you can too! So, because I love calendars and freebies, you can download a copy of a blank monthly blog planning calendar! Take a look!

Happy blog planning!