{Letters to My Daughter No. 6}

Dear Sweet Girl,
I love you. I'm over the moon crazy about you. You are kind, beautiful, smart, creative, and quite funny. You are. And, you work hard. You. Are. Awesome. It makes my heart hurt when you get hurt. I am sorry it's been a hard week. You've demonstrated patience and grace in the most frustrating of situations! We are so proud of you. But, sometimes it feels hard, doesn't it? Sometimes, it feels like too much. Then, it's easy slip into a spot where you feel like nothing is quite going the way you want it to go. Goodness, I've been there. I get it. But, we don't get to skip the rough patch. We have to walk through it. So, can I remind you of a few things that may help as you navigate the next couple of week?

1. Even though there are things that are beyond our control, we always get to choose how we respond. I don't ever want to tell you that you aren't allowed to feel sad or mad because, well, that's just unrealistic and unreasonable. But, guard your heart and mind. Don't let those moments of anger or sadness or negativity settle in and hold you hostage. Don't let those negative feelings determine what you do next. One bad moment doesn't always ruin the big picture.

2. People sometimes label us incorrectly. People may unfairly assume things about us. But, listen. You don't have to let those labels and assumptions stick. There is only One who gets to define you. When you find yourself in a troublesome spot, worried way too much about what someone else says or thinks, ask God to help you with that. And, He will.

3. Making a mistake is ok. Perfection is never the goal. Instead, work to make progress, and be willing to accept instruction and correction along the way. Always.

4. Don't strive. Rest. See, God knows how to make you the best version of yourself. Invite Him to do that in this situation. It's His work to do, really. You'll wear yourself out if you try to figure it out on your own. I'm praying that you come to a place where you say, "God, I trust that you'll take care of me in this situation. Show me what to do, and help me do it."

Here's the thing, sweet girl: even though the past few days have been hard, there's still something you can learn or something you can work on that will make you even more awesome. You can ask God to help you with that too, you know. Ask Him to show you how all this is good for you. Ask Him what you're supposed to be learning about yourself and to help you make progress. I know. It's not easy. Maybe it seems a little silly. But, when you belong to God, you can be sure He's concerned with all the details of your life, so lean on Him. Pray. And, listen. Listen until His voice rises above all the other noise. He loves you so. And, He sees you.

Be brave. Be strong. Be determined. Keep going.

XOXO.

{Dear Momma, It's Almost Your Birthday!}

Tomorrow is your birthday! I'm sure you have plans to celebrate -- at least, I hope you do. You deserve to celebrate. I'm looking forward to celebrating with you in a few weeks! That will be big fun! But, in the meantime, I thought it'd be a good day to remind you of a couple of things. You spent years pouring into me, and I wanted to pour something into you. So, here's what I want you to know.

1. I am grateful for you. Yeah, for sure. A funny thing happens once you're a momma. You quickly realize that being a mom is hard. Even on my best day, those pesky doubts creep in and leave me feeling like I came up short. And on my worst day - well, let's just say I'm left looking for a place to hide to avoid scarring my children for life. So not only do I want to say thank you, I want you to know that you did a good job. Whatever you did or didn't do, it worked out just fine. What I didn't quite understand back then was that being a mom was not your only gig. You were doing and being a lot of other things, too. So, thanks mom for sticking with it when you were exhausted and overwhelmed, on good days and bad, and on days when being a mom was the hardest hat you had to wear. Yeah, thank you.

2. I love you. But even more than that, God loves you. Maybe that feels a little cliche, but it's true. I am constantly reminding the kids of this truth, but sometimes, I need the reminder, too. I don't know the last time someone took the time to tell you: He loves you and you're pretty special, His masterpiece, in fact, created with intention and for purpose.

3. I pray for you. Being a momma is hard for sure, and so is being a woman. We push and strive trying to live up to unrealistic expectations and hard-to-keep-up-with standards. And we don't have to. We just don't. The mark of a great woman, I think, has nothing to do with all that and everything to do with how well we love the people God puts in front of us. And we can only do that well when we we fully realize how deeply loved we are. So, that's my prayer - that you know that you are deeply loved and can rest in that when rest is what you need. Nothing is wasted you know, even those seasons of difficulty; and, it is never to late to dream a new God-sized dream. This year, I'm praying that for you, too. 

You are lovely. I'm glad you're my mom. I am who I am because God wanted you to be my mom. I love that. I love you! Happy birthday, mom! Oh, and eat cake.

{Letters to My Daughter | No. 5}

Sweet girl, it’s been quite a whirl wind the past couple of weeks. Your first volleyball tournament of the new club season, your first winter ball, your first letter from a college volleyball coach - and all in the span of a few days. Listen, I know it can be overwhelming and exciting and sometimes even a little exhausting. So, here are a two things I want you to remember. 

1. Make sure you take time to pause and be grateful. Remember that the Creator of the Universe is weaving this beautiful story of your life in perfect detail. Sometimes, it’s helpful to take a look back at these moments and see how the Lord is working things out on your behalf. He knew exactly when you’d get that first letter about collegiate volleyball; He knew exactly how beautiful you’d look in your ball gown and which friends to surround you with; He knew exactly what needed to happen on the court during your tournament to help you continue to grow as a person and a player. He knows how to grow you into the very best version of yourself, and His timing is always perfect. Always, always take the time to thank Him for being concerned with the details of your life and invite Him to continue working His plan. He loves you more than you can begin to fathom. Don't miss an opportunity to thank Him for what He's doing! 

2. I want you to remember that WHO YOU ARE is what makes you a priceless treasure, a masterpiece. Your worth and value isn’t tied to what you do or how you perform. Yes, please keep it classy. I know that you will because that’s who you are. You’re that girl. We love you for who you are. God loves for who you are. There’s not one single thing you could do to earn more love and affection — you’ve got it. Unconditionally. Just because you are you. And by the way, you are fabulous. 

We love you sweet, brave, beautiful girl. We are so grateful that we get to be part of your story.

Keep growing. 

XO

{Letters to my Daughter} {No. 4}

Hi there sweet girl. I just left you in your bedroom studying frantically for a French final. What a long day you’ve had. We talked about this already, but writing it down can’t hurt. You know, it gives you something to come back to later when you need it. 

Seems like you’ve landed in a situation that is a little bit aggravating and a lot bit worrisome for you. When you find yourself in a group of people that you didn’t necessarily choose, it can be tricky. I want to remind you of two things. 

1. You are where you are by design. Sometimes we make the best choice we know how to make and once we’re in, things seem to fall apart. You look around and you think “I did not sign up for this!” But, you did. And you are exactly where you’re meant to be. You know how I know? I know it because I watched you walk through the process of making the decision. You did all the things one should when there’s a decision to be made. You gathered all the info you could, weighed the pros and cons. You got some advice from people you trust. And, you prayed about it. I was SO proud of you for walking through the process. When you commit to walking through the process, you learn to respond rather than react. You learn to make decisions that make sense in the bigger picture, the ones that help move you toward the goals and dreams God’s given you. That’s a good thing. God has His eye on you and He promises that He is with you.
2. Nothing is wasted when we remember God is for us. If you trust that you are exactly where you’re meant to be, you can be sure that God has something valuable for you to learn. He will use circumstances and even people to help you grow, to strengthen your faith, to increase your trust in Him. That’s hard when you’re in the middle of the mess. (Locker room convos can be rough.) But, it’s true. Remember to keep talking to God and listening. He wants to help. Ask Him to show you the thing He wants you to learn. And, He will. 

Here’s the thing: You’ll get through the season that you’re in. Not only will you get through it, you’ll emerge on the other side with a light that shines a bit brighter than before. And, you’ll know a little bit more about God. If you let Him, He’ll teach you something about His character and about yours. You’ll understand the depth of His love a bit more than you did before. That, sweet girl, is priceless. 

Keep going. One day at a time. Be strong. Be brave. 

I’m so proud of you. 

{Letters to my daughter} {No. 3}

Sweet Girl, When you leaned over and whispered, “I don’t think she believes in me” I was a tiny bit caught off guard. I know that feeling. It’s a terrible feeling! I am sorry that something happened to make you believe that. I get it. Truth be told, I would probably feel exactly the same way if that thing happened to me.

But, I have to tell you something. Lean in and listen carefully. It’s important.

I believe in you.

Always. No matter what. I believe in you when you have a good day. I believe in you when you have a bad day. I believe in you when you are at your best. I even believe in you when you aren’t your best. You are incredibly kind, smart, talented, and beautiful. You are a good, loyal friend. You’re honest. You’re a good big sister. You love Jesus. You’re an awesome volleyball player. And, you’re even a little funny! (Ok, you’re a lot funny!) Should I go on? I could fill an entire page!

Here’s the thing: Those things don’t change based on other people’s opinion.

I know how hard you work. I know how far you have come. I see how much you’ve grown up.

Don’t you dare let what seems like one person’s lack of confidence in you define you. Don’t let that squash out your dreams. Don’t let it disappoint you. Don’t let one person saying no keep you from hearing all the people cheering for you and saying yes!

When you are doing everything that you are supposed to do, let that be enough. Work on the things you have some control over and let the other things become secondary. Take responsibility when you mess up and learn from those mess-ups. Find the people God has placed in your life who want to help you grow and help you reach your dreams. Keep those people close.

I will keep reminding you, in the meantime, that I believe in you. I’m proud of you. I’m here when you need me. And don’t forget — believe in yourself. You have great things in you. No kidding. Great. Things.

Keep going.

Love you, sweet girl.