{Letters to My Daughter No. 6}

Dear Sweet Girl,
I love you. I'm over the moon crazy about you. You are kind, beautiful, smart, creative, and quite funny. You are. And, you work hard. You. Are. Awesome. It makes my heart hurt when you get hurt. I am sorry it's been a hard week. You've demonstrated patience and grace in the most frustrating of situations! We are so proud of you. But, sometimes it feels hard, doesn't it? Sometimes, it feels like too much. Then, it's easy slip into a spot where you feel like nothing is quite going the way you want it to go. Goodness, I've been there. I get it. But, we don't get to skip the rough patch. We have to walk through it. So, can I remind you of a few things that may help as you navigate the next couple of week?

1. Even though there are things that are beyond our control, we always get to choose how we respond. I don't ever want to tell you that you aren't allowed to feel sad or mad because, well, that's just unrealistic and unreasonable. But, guard your heart and mind. Don't let those moments of anger or sadness or negativity settle in and hold you hostage. Don't let those negative feelings determine what you do next. One bad moment doesn't always ruin the big picture.

2. People sometimes label us incorrectly. People may unfairly assume things about us. But, listen. You don't have to let those labels and assumptions stick. There is only One who gets to define you. When you find yourself in a troublesome spot, worried way too much about what someone else says or thinks, ask God to help you with that. And, He will.

3. Making a mistake is ok. Perfection is never the goal. Instead, work to make progress, and be willing to accept instruction and correction along the way. Always.

4. Don't strive. Rest. See, God knows how to make you the best version of yourself. Invite Him to do that in this situation. It's His work to do, really. You'll wear yourself out if you try to figure it out on your own. I'm praying that you come to a place where you say, "God, I trust that you'll take care of me in this situation. Show me what to do, and help me do it."

Here's the thing, sweet girl: even though the past few days have been hard, there's still something you can learn or something you can work on that will make you even more awesome. You can ask God to help you with that too, you know. Ask Him to show you how all this is good for you. Ask Him what you're supposed to be learning about yourself and to help you make progress. I know. It's not easy. Maybe it seems a little silly. But, when you belong to God, you can be sure He's concerned with all the details of your life, so lean on Him. Pray. And, listen. Listen until His voice rises above all the other noise. He loves you so. And, He sees you.

Be brave. Be strong. Be determined. Keep going.

XOXO.

{Letters to My Daughter | No. 5}

Sweet girl, it’s been quite a whirl wind the past couple of weeks. Your first volleyball tournament of the new club season, your first winter ball, your first letter from a college volleyball coach - and all in the span of a few days. Listen, I know it can be overwhelming and exciting and sometimes even a little exhausting. So, here are a two things I want you to remember. 

1. Make sure you take time to pause and be grateful. Remember that the Creator of the Universe is weaving this beautiful story of your life in perfect detail. Sometimes, it’s helpful to take a look back at these moments and see how the Lord is working things out on your behalf. He knew exactly when you’d get that first letter about collegiate volleyball; He knew exactly how beautiful you’d look in your ball gown and which friends to surround you with; He knew exactly what needed to happen on the court during your tournament to help you continue to grow as a person and a player. He knows how to grow you into the very best version of yourself, and His timing is always perfect. Always, always take the time to thank Him for being concerned with the details of your life and invite Him to continue working His plan. He loves you more than you can begin to fathom. Don't miss an opportunity to thank Him for what He's doing! 

2. I want you to remember that WHO YOU ARE is what makes you a priceless treasure, a masterpiece. Your worth and value isn’t tied to what you do or how you perform. Yes, please keep it classy. I know that you will because that’s who you are. You’re that girl. We love you for who you are. God loves for who you are. There’s not one single thing you could do to earn more love and affection — you’ve got it. Unconditionally. Just because you are you. And by the way, you are fabulous. 

We love you sweet, brave, beautiful girl. We are so grateful that we get to be part of your story.

Keep growing. 

XO

{Letters to my Daughter} {No. 4}

Hi there sweet girl. I just left you in your bedroom studying frantically for a French final. What a long day you’ve had. We talked about this already, but writing it down can’t hurt. You know, it gives you something to come back to later when you need it. 

Seems like you’ve landed in a situation that is a little bit aggravating and a lot bit worrisome for you. When you find yourself in a group of people that you didn’t necessarily choose, it can be tricky. I want to remind you of two things. 

1. You are where you are by design. Sometimes we make the best choice we know how to make and once we’re in, things seem to fall apart. You look around and you think “I did not sign up for this!” But, you did. And you are exactly where you’re meant to be. You know how I know? I know it because I watched you walk through the process of making the decision. You did all the things one should when there’s a decision to be made. You gathered all the info you could, weighed the pros and cons. You got some advice from people you trust. And, you prayed about it. I was SO proud of you for walking through the process. When you commit to walking through the process, you learn to respond rather than react. You learn to make decisions that make sense in the bigger picture, the ones that help move you toward the goals and dreams God’s given you. That’s a good thing. God has His eye on you and He promises that He is with you.
2. Nothing is wasted when we remember God is for us. If you trust that you are exactly where you’re meant to be, you can be sure that God has something valuable for you to learn. He will use circumstances and even people to help you grow, to strengthen your faith, to increase your trust in Him. That’s hard when you’re in the middle of the mess. (Locker room convos can be rough.) But, it’s true. Remember to keep talking to God and listening. He wants to help. Ask Him to show you the thing He wants you to learn. And, He will. 

Here’s the thing: You’ll get through the season that you’re in. Not only will you get through it, you’ll emerge on the other side with a light that shines a bit brighter than before. And, you’ll know a little bit more about God. If you let Him, He’ll teach you something about His character and about yours. You’ll understand the depth of His love a bit more than you did before. That, sweet girl, is priceless. 

Keep going. One day at a time. Be strong. Be brave. 

I’m so proud of you. 

{Letters to my daughter} {No. 3}

Sweet Girl, When you leaned over and whispered, “I don’t think she believes in me” I was a tiny bit caught off guard. I know that feeling. It’s a terrible feeling! I am sorry that something happened to make you believe that. I get it. Truth be told, I would probably feel exactly the same way if that thing happened to me.

But, I have to tell you something. Lean in and listen carefully. It’s important.

I believe in you.

Always. No matter what. I believe in you when you have a good day. I believe in you when you have a bad day. I believe in you when you are at your best. I even believe in you when you aren’t your best. You are incredibly kind, smart, talented, and beautiful. You are a good, loyal friend. You’re honest. You’re a good big sister. You love Jesus. You’re an awesome volleyball player. And, you’re even a little funny! (Ok, you’re a lot funny!) Should I go on? I could fill an entire page!

Here’s the thing: Those things don’t change based on other people’s opinion.

I know how hard you work. I know how far you have come. I see how much you’ve grown up.

Don’t you dare let what seems like one person’s lack of confidence in you define you. Don’t let that squash out your dreams. Don’t let it disappoint you. Don’t let one person saying no keep you from hearing all the people cheering for you and saying yes!

When you are doing everything that you are supposed to do, let that be enough. Work on the things you have some control over and let the other things become secondary. Take responsibility when you mess up and learn from those mess-ups. Find the people God has placed in your life who want to help you grow and help you reach your dreams. Keep those people close.

I will keep reminding you, in the meantime, that I believe in you. I’m proud of you. I’m here when you need me. And don’t forget — believe in yourself. You have great things in you. No kidding. Great. Things.

Keep going.

Love you, sweet girl.

{Letters to My Daughter} {No. 2}

Sweet Girl, You wrote me the most lovely letter. Thank you. Because I know you are dying to know -- yes, it made me cry! Big. Tears. I didn't cry just because you said nice things about me and to me. I cried because as a momma it is pretty awesome to see God working in your life.

God used you and your words in that letter to encourage me. That makes my heart swell to the point of bursting. Do you hear me? God used you. Let that sink in. 

There are three things I want you to know and remember.

1. Words are powerful. Use them well.  Speak life. Speak hope. Speak words of encouragement. Once you release your words, it is impossible to get them back. It's like squeezing an entire tube of toothpaste out onto a plate and trying to put it back inside the tube. (I used to do that on the first day of school in front of the class. Trying to put toothpaste back into a tube is quite messy!) It's the same with our words, you know. If used unwisely--carelessly--words hurt, leave scars, cause damage to relationships. And always, always remember your words reveal your heart. Guard your heart and use your words well. Let every word you speak be a reflection of Jesus' love being perfected in you. The letter you wrote me is a glowing example of what I'm talking about. You spoke life and encouragement to me. What a gift!

2. God will use you. Look around and listen to Him. I am sure when you wrote my letter you didn't think you were doing anything extraordinary. Yet the words you wrote were exactly the words I needed to hear in that very moment. You should know that there are people around you who need the same kind of gift you gave me--words of life. Can I challenge you to look for them? On purpose. Ask God to use you to encourage someone each day. Ask Him. I promise He will. This is not the first time you've used words to encourage. You have a gift of encouragement. Once you wrote an encouraging message to a kid who was a few years younger than you. You leave sweet notes for your siblings and for us. Keep doing that. Remember, you may never know how God uses the words you speak and that's ok. You just be brave and bold. Be obedient to the voice of the Holy Spirit and speak life.

3. I love you. You are extraordinary. If I could line up all the girls on the planet and pick one to be my daughter, I would choose you. Every single time.

I'm glad you're my girl. (Even when we're having a bad day!)

XOXO.